The way you feel about those around you in your work environment has a massive effect on your day. Enhancing professional relationships can transform your job.
We spend a large portion of each day in our work environment. The way we feel in our job has a significant impact on our level of job satisfaction, our energy levels, concentration, and our self-confidence.
We can think about your relationships at work in 2 ways. The way you relate to yourself, in terms of your self-belief, how confident you feel, how well you communicate, and how you speak to yourself. Then we have the relationships you have at work; how do you deal with public speaking, confrontation, intimidating bosses, or people you look up to. Let’s take a closer look at how your professional relationship challenges can show up.
Your professional confidence. Despite personal reviews, evidenced accomplishments and great feedback from colleagues and clients, many people live with some form of impostor syndrome. This is a psychological pattern of behaviour where you persistently doubt or worry about your level of ability and have an internalised fear about being exposed as a fraud or a fake. This can manifest in a wide number of ways, but often it shows up by constantly second guessing yourself, worrying what people will think about you and if they like you, and a real battle for you to be authentic. When something goes ‘wrong’ you may dwell on it for days, ruminate on it and think about how you could have done it better, and then think about all the ways you could ‘redeem’ yourself. You may know that you can put on quite an impressive outward ‘mask’, and yet on the inside and when people aren’t around these issues take up time, space and energy in your mind. Despite staying calm on the outside, you often take feedback as a personal criticism and take it heart. This affects your mood, your motivation, and can make it difficult to concentrate at work.
More often than not it shows up through you not daring to go for that promotion, doubting your ability before interviews, and by questioning yourself if you can step up and be the leader you want to become. All of these behaviour come back to a number of common limiting beliefs, which when acknowledged and overcome, could transform the way you see yourself.
Your professional communication. How confident do you feel when you are speaking to others? What about when you are speaking in front of a group? Or when you are speaking to your superiors? Very often people may feel anxious in these types of situations, and this shows through struggling to articulate things clearly, a feeling of blushing or struggling to maintain eye contact. Often people will hold themselves back for fear of saying the ‘wrong’ thing, or they struggle to speak up in meetings in case they say something that might make them appear ‘stupid’. These are all common problems that prevent you from reaching your career goals and really demonstrating just how capable you are.
Confrontation or difficult conversations can also cause lots of internal anxiety and worry. You may end up doing things you don’t fully think is right because it is easier than addressing an issue which could easily create friction and disagreements. As you don’t feel confident to handle them you avoid them as it’s safer and easier, but on the inside it takes it’s toll. For a lot of people their superiors or team members can be quite intense or authoritative, which means talking to them can be intimidating and a bit scary. These people will continue to run your life until you can master how to deal with them and manage them effectively.
Then finally we have one of the most common challenging professional relationships; people you think are better than. We each have people we look up to and aspire to be like, the difference is that some people are inspired to take action because what they see in this individual they recognise in themselves, where as others see other people as ‘better’ than them and so they minimise themselves, and put this other individual up on a pedestal. All this does is create a sense of self-deprecation which lowers you self-worth and hinders your progress.
If these professional challenges are impacting you and the way you feel about your job, you are not alone. Overcoming these challenges can liberate you from past fears and worries and help you progress towards achieving your dreams. Unfortunately many people allow these issues to hold them back for years and years, whereas a short period of effective and purposeful work can free you up for a lifetime. To find out more about how I can help you overcome these challenges, complete the form below.
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